livealifethatscompletelyfree

lexpeditionsexpeditions:

I’d like to name my kid a whole phrase, you know, something like ‘Ladies and Gentlemen’. That’ll be a cool name for a kid. “This is my son, Ladies and Gentlemen”… Then when he gets out of hand I get to go “Ladies and Gentlemen, please!”

• The meal is not over when I’m full. The meal is over when I hate myself.
• I’m buying a Cinnabon…at the airport…I arrived at. You understand why that’s extra disgusting, right?. Because when you’re at the airport you’re leaving from you can say “Oh, I gotta eat. I need some food, because I might be trapped in the sky forever so I should eat right now.” But I’ve landed. The trip is over. I’m 20 minutes from my house where I got bananas and apples and shit. And I’m sitting on my luggage just fuckin eating a Cinnabon with a fork and knife.”

(Source: queasyweasley)